LOLA is 6 months old...

Im here on my new blog and this is my 1st post on it. The old blogs name didnt match the journey on on now so Im happier with the new one - it suits me more -even though Ive lost all but 3 followers....


Today is special - Im 6 months banded today and I have had lots of ups and downs on this crazy crazy journey...

I thought that it would be easy - make this huge medical and financial commitment and I would be melting the weight off my body because how on earth could I not....???? Wouldn't $16,000 and surgery make my brain think - shit she's serious we should help her do this... We'll I was wrong wrong wrong - so very very wrong - my brain was the same as always and I gave my band more responsibility than it could live up to. Im sorry LOLA...

This is what I have learned so far....

• Spending money and having surgery does not cure emotional eating
• Bandster hell is a horrible emotional and physical ride that is unavoidable in some form or another.
• My band is not the boss of my brain 
• Sometime my will power is weak
• Everyones sweet spot is DIFFERENT
• The sweet spot changes
• Non bandsters cannot eat like I NEED to eat no matter how much they try
• My parents dont get it - so stop trying to explain 
• Trying to act like I dont have a band while eating with others is stupid
• Watch the 1st bite - it gets me stuck 97% of the time
• I will binge sometimes - let it go - don't let it consume you
• Not everyone slimes
• Sliming means Ive gone too far
• PB'ing is awful
• I MUST learn from my mistakes
• Ask for help when you need it - someone will answer
• Sometimes the giant potholes in the road test you to your limit
• Its ok to cry
• Its ok to medicate
• People assume Im weak cause I have the band - but I am not
• It is a hard ride
• I CAN eat around my band - but choose not to - most of the time
• Tracking my food helps - I hate it but its true
• Im not good at keeping my eye on my goals
• Weighing yourself everyday provides prospective
• ACCOUNTABILITY
• Other people have strange and unrealistic goals for me now that Im banded
• I must stay in contact with my clinic 
• Blogging helps get the emotional stuff out
• Other bandsters get it
• I can do this even if Im slow out of the gate

Thats not everything Im sure but the really important stuff so far.

My highest weight 284 lbs

My weight today 254 lbs.

Total Loss 30lbs in 6 months.

I made a list when I started this and here's what Ive checked off so far...

1. Sit on the floor with the kids
2. Get stuff from upstairs (instead of sending the kids)
3. Pick up something from the floor - there has been a green highlighter under my desk at work for 2 months (the cleaners don't seem to clean there) and for the life of me I cannot get down there to get it so I pretend not to know its there but its driving me crazy!
4. Ride a bike
5. Dance - not professionally just for fun
6. Clean my house in 1 day instead of in parts because I get to tired
7. Buy sale cloths that are $5 not $39.99
8. Buy cloths where I want
9. Get a bikini wax
10. Paint my own toes
11. Wear shoes I have to do up
12. Wear cute shoes - there are so many in my closet that I haven't seen in ages  1 pair out so far
13. Go see a baseball game with my kids - Ive been too afraid I can't fit in the seats
14. Take my kids to Canada's Wonderland - again can't fit on the rides
15. Wear the seatbelt in my sisters car - really important - who makes a seatbelt that short? 
16. Wear a bathing suit
17. Take a bath
18. Wear a regular robe at the spa on my birthday-wont they be shocked!
19. Do up my winter coat
20. Wear my winter coat when winter begins instead of my wrap or sweater (trying to delay the wearing of my winter coat that does NOT do up anymore)
21. Play
22. Fit in a booth at the restaurant
23. Take the dog for a daily walk
24. Buy jeans - I don't know if I'll even like jeans since I only wear dresses and skirts but I would like the option to buy them if I want to.
25. Ask for a doggie bag
26. Sit cross legged
27. Go up the stairs without holding on
28. Sit on my hubby's lap
29. Have my mom see me thin - she's 86
30. Get on a horse again 
31. Carry my son to bed - I cant add his weight to mine it's too much This wont happen even If I reach goal as he is growing like a weed.
32. Walk barefoot - ahhhh!!!!
33. Go for a walk to the waterfall with my kids - I have never seen it its been too far for me to walk
34. Travel
35. Post a full length photo of me on Facebook
36. Sit in an airplane seat in economy
37. Wear pants
38. Buy some lingerie
39. Take a 'mom not hiding behind a kid and a dog' family photo
40. Cry about something other than being fat
41. Meet me again

Not too bad for a bumpy 6 months. I hope the next 6 months will be a bit more calm...